Six Weeks

Over the last six weeks I have sat down to write on my little blog more than once.  Sometimes I got a few sentences in and erased it all; sometimes I couldn't bring up any words at all.  These past six weeks have brought a lot of change.  Some good, some hard, but all God's perfect plan. A post like this will never be how I envisioned chronicling these events, but life doesn't always play out how you envision it either.

Before turn in, Moray had one last adventure with my family.  We did some traveling which included a visit to New York City, and his first flight to Orlando:

November 7th was my last day holding Moray's leash as a puppy in program.  That afternoon, I gave my little buddy one last kiss goodbye as he entered Professional training.

Two-and-a-half short weeks later, on the day before Thanksgiving, our puppy program manager called with the news no puppy raiser wants to hear.  Moray's release from training was not a complete surprise, but much of what she had to say was hard to process.  Moray decided that being a service dog just was not for him, and has been adopted by my grandparents to live as a spoiled Change of Career pet.  

From when he was still a PIT

Moray, 

You were a joy, always.  The sixteen months that I was blessed enough to have you were some of the best in my life so far.  I don't know all that God has in plan for you or I, but I know it's going to be pretty amazing.  Thank you for loving so freely and always knowing how to make everyone around you laugh.  I will always be proud to have been your puppy raiser.  I love you forever.

Oh, the Places You'll Go

Congratulations! 

Today is your day.

You're off to great places!

You're off and away!

You have brains in your head.

You have feet in your shoes.

You can steer yourself

any direction you choose. 

You're on your own.  And you know what you know.

And YOU are the guy who'll decide where to go.

You'll look up and down streets.  Look 'em over with care.

 About some you will say, "I don't choose to go there."

With your head full of brains and your shoes full of feet,

You're too smart to go down any not-so-good street.

And you may not find any

You'll want to go down.

In that case, of course,

You'll head strait out of town.

It's opener there

In the wide open air.

Out there things can happen

And frequently do

To people as brainy

And footsy as you.

And then things start to happen,

Don't worry.  Don't stew.

Just go right along.

You'll start happening too.

OH!

THE PLACES YOU'LL GO!

You'll be be on your way up!

You'll be seeing great sights!

You'll join the high fliers

Who soar to high heights.

You won't lag behind, because you'll have the speed.

You'll pass the whole gang and you'll soon take the lead.

Wherever you fly, you'll be the best of the best.

Wherever you go, you'll top all the rest.

You'll get mixed up, of course,
As you already know.
You'll get mixed up
With many strange birds as you go.
So be sure when you step.
Step with care and great tact.
And remember that Life's
A Great Balancing Act. 
Just never forget to be dexterous and deft.
And never mix up your right foot with your left.

And will you succeed?
Yes!  You will, indeed!
(98 and 3/4 percent guaranteed.)

KID, YOU'LL MOVE MOUNTAINS!

So...
Be your name Buxbaum or Bixby or Bray
Or Mordecai Ali Van Allen O'Shea
You're off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
So... get on your way!

**All text taken from "Oh, the Places You'll Go!" by Dr. Seuss.  Copyright by Dr. Seuss Enterprises, L.P. 1960**

Week of Lasts

Moray and I have had a busy, busy semester.  He has been on many an adventure lately, despite my lack of writing.  

Field trip to the Fire Station

We have been to a puppy raising workshop, group trips to the fire station and airport, we have done promotional events for Canine Companions, and many other training outings.  

Checking out the ambulance

Airport exposure 

Getting ready to go through security

The TSA were fantastic to help out Moray and Hardy in their training! This is hopefully the beginning of a long relationship with them and our Canine Companions puppies!

The Week of Lasts is always an emotional week.  Yesterday was Moray's last outing with his local Canine Companions friends.  Today was his last day of Community Bible Study, tomorrow will be his last day of class with me, as well as his last puppy class, Friday will be his last day of Awana...the list goes on.  

My chest tightens and my eyes fill as I think that next time I am at ____, there will be no bouncy black lab at my side.  My hand won't be nudged by a jovial puppy who knows I still carry the occasional treat for especially good boys like himself.

I can willingly go through the heartache of goodbyes a million times over because it means that I have gotten to share the last seventeen months with an amazing creature who has taught me more than I have taught him.

Excuse my dorky face, and know that we laugh together...a lot. And it makes me smile.

And there's something even better coming ahead.  This week of lasts is needed.  It's essential in order for Moray to make a new set of Firsts.  Firsts with his new trainer, Firsts with his forever human in whatever career he chooses.  And that is a beautiful thing.

Today

Today.

Today marks fifty days until Moray says goodbye to Tennessee.

Today marks fifty-eight days till I say goodbye to my best little buddy.

Today is the day that those first tears have slipped out from under my eyelids.  

When you pick these bouncy, rolley-polley puppies up at not-quite-eight weeks old, eighteen months seems like a lifetime away.  Before you know it, they finally can hold their bladders until you get them outside, they learn not to howl in their kennels, they "sit," "stand, " "heel," "jump," "roll," "under," and so much more with only the whisper of a word.  They prance next to you with that coveted "J" in their leash, not even tugging at that grown man whistling at them across the isle, rather, looking up at you as if to say "take that.  I'm so good, aren't I mom?"  All the while they are wiggling their way into the deepest parts of your heart.

And all too soon, you find yourself with an email glaring at you in your inbox entitled "November Matriculation is Approaching."  

No.

Just no.

I'm not ready for this.

But then you look down at the almost-seventeen month old puppy snoozing on your feet and you realize that he is ready.  

All his commands have been learned (more or less).

All your worries about his behavior in public have disappeared, and he can handle just about anything with confidence and ease.

But most importantly, he knows how to love.  He knows how to laugh.  He knows a simple game of fetch should be the highlight of your day.  He knows he can make friends wherever he is.  He knows mornings are greeted with wiggles and happy dances, and nights are ended with a kiss.  

He's ready.  

You just need to catch up.

Update!

Yesterday I was pleasantly surprised to get my first update on how Dante is doing in Advanced Training.  I will not receive his first training report for another month, so while this was just a generic email sent to all puppy raisers who recently turned in pups, it was still nice to get something.  

In the last three weeks, Dante has made it through his preliminary temperament testing, a thorough health exam to clear him to continuing in training, as well as a field trip.  He has been assigned to a trainer (I will not know who until his first report), and has been working on proofing the 30 commands he learned with me.  

While it is so, so, so hard to not get minute by minute updates on Dante; right now no new is good news.  Dogs in Advanced Training (or the puppy program for that matter) can get released at any time, so no phone call from CCI today means he is doing well enough that they want to keep him tomorrow.

I miss that little Firecracker like crazy, but am also very excited for him.  Now to start counting down to his first real training report, and not die of impatience before it comes!

Our "last hurrah" of an outing -- SeaWorld Orlando, the day before Turn In.

Updating

Life around here doesn't look like it is going to calm down any time soon.  Hence the lack of blogging.  Unfortunately, it has fallen down on my list of priorities, which I hate, but for now is just how it is.

I have many, many thoughts still swirling in my head about Dante and turn in (has it only been 2 weeks?!?).  I am not a self-proclaimed writer, but I need to write to get my thoughts straight for my own good.  These I have chosen not to write on the blog because I do not like to feel that I have to justify my feelings, and while I hate to feel that I leave "loose ends" on here, that is just the way it is for now. 

Now on to Moray!  Although I hate to have a lag in blogging, it almost feels right in this case -- a kind of "reset" to Everything Moray.  

Moray is such a sweetie!  Oh my!  Do I love this age!  He now responds to not only his name, but "Hey Gorgeous!" as well.  ;)  The last two weeks have taken some adjusting for him too.  Since he arrived in June, he has had at least one, but up to four other dogs in the house all the time.  

It feels so serene around here with only one puppy.  So far, he has amazing house manners.  Having a puppy that (so far) ignores anything inappropriate in the house, and only goes for his toys is so weird.  I still stand in awe that at 4.5 months, he is better in the house than a certain Golden we all know-and-love was when he turned in at 20 months!  I know it won't last long.  The Terrible Teens are just around the corner, but it is nice to have hope!  

We have been in school full-force for a month now.  I have a very full schedule with co-op, homeschool classes, and class at the community college.  It will be a few months before Moray can keep up with that, but he is making good progress in his training.  

I always hate to compare puppies, but it is hard not to note the differences.  Moray is not nearly as high-energy as Dante was, and he is learning to settle very well.  He came to co-op on Friday for the first time.  We meet in a church, and it is pretty calm with not that many people, and he did fantastic.  Slept or played with toys the whole time.  The only complaint one could have was the noises he makes in his sleep, but if that is it, it is the least of my worries!

We are getting ready to head into "big boy status" as 5 months is less than two weeks away.  This means wearing the "official" Canine Companions Puppy in Program vest, and going on public outings.  He is ready.  Moray has grown a lot in his commands and maturity in general.  He gets so serious when his vest and gentle leader go on.  It is so adorable!  He loves to work, learn new things, and go to new places.  Not much else you can ask for!

I do not have much to say about these, other than that in writing this post I have realized just how few pictures I have of this cutie.  Moray loved his first visit to the grocery store to learn about carts though!

Turn In

The sixteenth of August, two-thousand-thirteen has been a date marked and saved on my calender since February of last year.  A day that at times, couldn't come soon enough, but a date that most of the time, it seemed we were rushing toward at lightning speed.  Well, it has come and gone -- nearly a week ago now.  There is a weird quiet now that it is passed.  Maybe because the absolute c.r.a.z.y. life was up until then (okay, life itself hasn't calmed down that much, but I digress).

 I originally planned a more fun, two part post of our trip for Turn In, but I'm not feelin' it today.  Maybe I'll add deltails of our trip itself later... We'll see.

It is hard to find a place to start about what Turn In is like.  I have heard it from countless other puppy raisers, read the itinerary of the day several times, and have tried to mentally and emotionally prepare for this every day for eighteen months.  I have even told scores of strangers how it was going to be.

Let me tell you.  Nothing prepares you for it.  Nothing.

It was so good, sad, downright sucked, exciting, hopeful, and inspiring all at the same time.  You leave a chunck of your heart on that campus, but go home wanting to raise ten more puppies.

Dante and his litter mate, Deacon.

The day itself was good.  Life has been so busy, I hadn't had time to really process it until we got there, and then it hit me, and with all the "festivities," it was hard to think about much else, and it was a battle to fight the tears on and off through the day.

They way that CCI aligns matriculation with the graduation of new teams is so perfect!  It keeps you grounded and in perspective of just why you can do this.  There was a 13 year old boy who graduated with a Skilled Companion, and I had a view of his mom from where I sat.  She cried tears of Joy throughout the entire ceremony.  We don't give puppies up for "disabled people."  We do it for little K, and E, and the amazing, selfless wounded veteran that graduated that day.  

Dante and Novel.

Dante and I with Katherine and Novel.

Not to say that I am in any way perfect.  While I know I have raised this puppy for the right reasons, feelings of selfishness creep up in the exact minute you kiss that baby goodbye, and you really don't want to do it.  You only do it because you have to.  I wish that didn't happen.  I know every day I had Dante, and even in the hours and days following, I have wanted this, but I wish that even in the act of handing the leash over I had wanted it.

My last words to Dante were not good luck.  Even though his future career is unknown to me, it is not left up to luck.  Even if Dante doesn't make it to graduation, I have peace that Dante is right where he needs to be right now.  I know that God has the perfect place picked out for him, and I pray that I will be at peace wherever that may be.

Crazy

I cannot believe that tomorrow is the day that we head to Canine Companion's Southeast Regional Training Center.  The last week (let's face it, the last two months) have been on the crazy side.  It is a good thing because it has helped kept my mind off of turn in, and kept me sane.  

 Last week we headed to North Carolina for a week.  Moray stayed with Young's raisers, had a fabulous vacation, and grew about three inches. 

One of the many photos I received of Moray's grand time away.

Dante came with us, and also had a good time.  He somehow got hold of aluminum foil without us knowing, and was sick for the first three days.  We ended up taking him to our old vet there, and he is fine now.  But, he had fun on outings to new places, and seeing my older sisters one last time.

Visited my sisters' school

Sit (stays) at my sisters' school

Novel stairs checked off as well.

Saying goodbye to my sisters.

On our way home Monday, we picked up a sweet CCI puppy named Odina.  Odina is turning in with Dante, but sadly her raiser isn't able to take her, so she has spent the last few days with us, and will be flying with my mom, Dante, and I.  Odina is such a sweetie!  She is so good with her commands, is super cuddly, and gets along great with Dante and Moray.

Dante and Odina at Starbucks

Grocery shopping together

Hey, look! They are capable of being in the same room and NOT playing ;)

Last day together.  Moray is already 32 lbs!

Gonna miss watching these two play together.

At the vet.  Moray for his last set of shots, and Odina for a health certificate.  Moray is now legal to go to dog-friendly places, and Odina is cleared to fly!

Practicing his settling.  He always puts his paw on my foot to make sure I reward him for a job well done.