Wednesday, April 18, 2012

How to Make Your Dog Think You're Sleeping in 6 Easy Steps

(Slight Disclaimer:  While I am not by choice a morning-person, know that Dante's need have never been neglected or ignored, and that this post is written in all fun and games (-:  )

1.  Make a plan.  Preferably consisting of the following five steps:
2.  Make sure that they cannot see your face from the crate.  If you don't read the rest of this post, know that this is the most important.
3.  (Continued from #1)If you think that they might be awake, do not look at them!  The worst thing you can do is make eye-contact.*
4.  Be a statue.  I used to move a lot when I sleep, but if your dog even thinks that they hear the slightest movement, then it's all over.
5.  If you like to leave a few extra minutes for the "snooze" button, only leave your phone alarm on vibrate, preferably as far away from the dog and as close to you as possible (I have found that if I wake up before my alarm, then hold my phone under covers, then it is almost impossible for Dante to hear it).  
6.  If all else fails (this part is inevitable), then you have no choice but to get up.  But, hopefully, the above points have prolonged this step as long as possible.

*Caution:  If you break rule #3, and see a face this cute, it may send you into pity mode and you'll get up even after only three hours of sleep:
Dante at 8 weeks asleep, with is chin resting on my lap

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